


Old Married Couple

by Cajuzinhoinho



Series: BrArg Week 2020 [7]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: BrArg, Dialogue Heavy, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Smut, brargweek 2020, except on the smut. yeah, the fruk is just on one tiny scene, this is very silly, very silly smut though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:35:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27798592
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cajuzinhoinho/pseuds/Cajuzinhoinho
Summary: Luciano thinks they’re getting old, Martín thinks Luciano makes no sense.
Relationships: Argentina/Brazil (Hetalia), England/France (Hetalia)
Series: BrArg Week 2020 [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2025860
Comments: 9
Kudos: 11





	Old Married Couple

**Author's Note:**

> And we finally got to the end of it! After yesterday’s needless angst I thought we should end this in a more lighthearted note. This is very silly, but I hope y’all have fun  
> And one last thanks to @ottamanliest, who made all these fics in english possible with her unending patience with me.

The argument started on the night of their anniversary. It was 9:30 p.m., they were in their bed, Martín had yawned loudly and closed his eyes, ready to sleep. Luciano smiled fondly, and murmured:

“We're an old married couple, Tin.”

Martín's eyes snapped open and he turned to Luciano. 

“No, we're not.”

“Yes, we are.”

Martín propped himself up on his elbow, suddenly awake. 

“We're not old!”

Luciano chuckled. 

“Yeah, because we're immortal. But this is, what, our fortieth anniversary?”

“I’m pretty sure it's not forty yet,” Martín raised an eyebrow, though there was a hint of doubt behind his skepticism. “And it depends on how you’re counting. It could be way less.”

“The point is,” Luciano sat on the bed and tucked a strand of hair behind Martín's ear. “That we stopped counting. And we didn’t really celebrate it and now we're heading to sleep before 10 p.m. on our anniversary.”

“I did the-”

“As much as I love your blowjobs, I don't think that counts as an anniversary gift.”

“I think it's a wonderful gift!” Martín protested, a bit offended at his words. “And it's not like you bought a real gift or suggested we ate out or something…”

“That's the point. We don't care anymore. We're an old married couple.”

“I think that’s bullshit.” Martín rolled his eyes and went to sleep.

.

About a week later, Luciano went to his godfather's house to have lunch. Arthur, thankfully, wasn’t the one to cook, but his in all ways but legal husband Francis was capable of making food that tended to not be poisonous. As Luciano got ready, Martín made a comment. 

“See, that's an old married couple. They're old and have been together for ages and if I didn’t know France I’d be sure they don’t even fuck anymore. We're nothing like them.”

“That's because they've been together for what? A century? Almost that? It's different…”

“No, it's not.”

“You never agree with me...”

“I agree with you when you're right.”

Luciano rolled his eyes and left.

. 

“When you've been with someone for so long, and especially us nations where so long can seem like nothing, it is normal that the thrill of romance gradually fades,” Francis explained to Luciano when asked about his marriage. “It's up to the both of you to find ways to keep it alive in the midst of the casual day-to-day intimacy time gives you.”

Luciano listened attentively.

“How do you know you're getting old?” He asked, taking a sip of his red wine.

“Everyone around you starts to sound like loud children!” Arthur replied.

“Everyone sounds like loud children to you.” Francis giggled a remark filled with both annoyance and affection. “Well, you start going out less, sleeping more… stay at home watching old movies, and…”

“Rusting.” Arthur interrupted.

“But we bicker way less than we used to. We used to fight about anything, now we just don't bother most of the time.”

“That's a lie, you nag me all day!”

“It's not nagging, I'd just appreciate it if for once you didn't leave your socks on the floor! You're like a teenager sometimes…”

“And you call me the old man!”

Luciano watched them get into an argument about silly everyday things in the middle of lunch, and every beat was all so familiar he didn't quite know how to feel.

.

“We don't go out, we sleep too early, and we don’t fight as much as we used to but we still bicker about everything! We're just like them!” Luciano ranted once he got home, pacing from side to side in the living room. 

Martín was seated on the sofa, previously watching some dumb movie on his laptop until Luciano had arrived.

“We don't bicker about everything!”

“We’re bickering right now!”

“That’s because you started it!”

Luciano huffed and walked into the kitchen, opening the fridge to get a snack.

“We’re out of yogurt,” he grumbled

“Out of milk too. And eggs. And toothpaste.”

“My point is, I don’t know why you’re so resistant to accept that we’re an old married couple. Officially.”

Martín groaned.

“And I don’t know why you’re so insistent on that. We're not old, we’re not married, just leave it!”

“It’s about how we act…” 

“You’re not making any sense. Here, I’ll prove it to you.” he typed something furiously on his laptop. “Here. _‘Five signs you’re an old married couple’_ ” 

“These websites are crap, and you know it. You can’t trust them.” 

“If you think we can trust France on this, then we can trust the internet.” 

Luciano sat next to him on the sofa and tried to read what was on the website.

“Number one,” Martín started. “You prefer to stay at home rather than go out.” 

“Exactly what I said.” 

“Oh please, we don’t go out because the economy is shit.” he countered. “Number two, you talk shit about your in-laws in front of each other. See, we never do that, even though I think your dad is a dick and you agree, I never say it. Number three-”

“You stop taking care of yourself, shaving, waxing, and trying to look good.” Luciano read out loud from the website. 

“See, neither of us have done that.”

“I was getting my butt waxed decades before we dated, I wasn't gonna stop just because of a stable relationship!” Luciano protested. “And you just look better clean-shaven and you hate not looking your best.” 

“Sounds like you’re making excuses.”

“You’re the one making excuses!”

“Because you’re the one talking nonsense!”

“It’s not nonsense!” 

“IT IS!”

Luciano was taken aback. It had been playful squabbling and bantering for him, but suddenly Martín's face was red and his voice was louder than it should, angrier than it should. He would’ve raised his voice to match if he wasn't so... surprised at the reaction. He frowned.

“Why are you so angry?”

Martín turned his face away. 

“I’m not,” he murmured.

“Yes, you are.” Luciano tried to touch his face, but Martín didn’t let him. 

“I’m not! You’re the one- Listen, if you’re so unhappy with me you can just leave, okay? You can just leave!”

What?

“I- Why would you think I’m unhappy?! We’ve been together for forty years, why would I-”

“Not forty.” 

“I don’t give a fuck. Why would I stay if I didn’t want to?”

“How am I supposed to know?! You’re the one complaining it’s not the same and that it’s not fun anymore, I’m sorry if _I_ thought we were doing fine but apparently we aren’t and-”

“We are!” Luciano said a little too loud.

“Then why are you insisting we’re some old married couple like there’s no passion and no fun anymore?!” Martín said louder.

“Because-!” Luciano started saying even louder, but then it broke into laughter, to the point it got in the way of him continuing to speak. “-because it’s a good thing. Because we are too comfortable around each other sometimes. We didn't celebrate our anniversary because we both assume it will happen again next year, we… it’s a good thing!” 

This time, Martín let him touch his face, though his expression remained unpleasant.

“Because I’d marry you. I’d spend these forty years with you, even if we were mortals and your butt was all wrinkly and you went bald, I’d still do that. I’d love to be old and married to you, Martín Hernández.” 

Martín still wasn't looking at Luciano, but his face had softened and the angry red was turning into a pink blush. Luciano wrapped both his arms around his body and rested his chin on his shoulder until he looked at him. 

“... thank God I’m never going to go bald.” 

Luciano laughed, and he did too, and everything was fine in an instant as if there had never been an issue. They kissed, just for a bit, then Luciano laid his head on Martín’s shoulder and cuddled a little closer.

“Read the rest, I’m curious.” 

Martín chuckled and continued: 

“Number four, going to sleep before 10 p.m. on a weekend.” 

“Ha! I told you we’re getting old.” Luciano laughed. “What’s the last one?”

Martín rolled his eyes and kissed him on the cheek.

“Ok, the last one. Five, sex has become… rare. And boring.” 

There was silence.

“We’re not _boring_.” Martín started, sending a look to Luciano warning that he’d better agree.

“Well…”

“No.” he cut him off without a chance. “We’re just… vanilla. That’s not a bad thing. It’s not the same as boring. You like vanilla.” 

Luciano smiled, running his fingers through Martín's hair. 

“I like vanilla, and I don’t think we’re boring.” 

“So why are you complaining?”

“I just think…” he sighed, though he was still smiling. “We used to have more of it, that’s all. Remember? Not five years ago we were all over each other every second we had.”

Martín frowned, then shook his head.

“No, I don’t think that's true. We’re not that old. When was the last time?”

“Last week. The anniversary blowjob. And before that, I don’t know… ?”

Martín’s eyes widened as he processed that information. Then, he put his laptop to the side and held Luciano’s wrist. 

“No, that is just unacceptable.” He got up and pulled Luciano too, leading them both down the hall to their room. “We’re changing that immediately. Starting today.” 

Luciano followed him laughing and without question. It was amusing, really, how Martín’s serious expression showed that of all things _that_ was what affected him, and that he hadn't even noticed it before. They really were getting old.

Martín was kissing him the second they got to their bedroom. Luciano held him close with both arms and kissed back, in a way so familiar but never tiring. They kissed until it inevitably became too hot for both to continue just like that, with their bodies pressed together, only a step away from grinding. Martín took off Luciano’s clothes and Luciano took off his, leaving them together in a messy pile in the corner.

“What do you wanna do?” Luciano asked between a bite and a kiss on Martín’s neck. 

“Hm…” Martín paused, then he held Luciano a little firmer to throw him in the bed. 

Luciano smiled breathlessly once his head hit the pillow, and Martín went to open the drawer by the bed. 

“I think I’m gonna ride you.” he finally answered, climbing into the bed on top of Luciano. “Any objections?” 

Luciano shook his head, and couldn't keep the stupidest, dumbest smile off his face. 

They kissed on the bed a little while more, then Martín opened the little tube of lube he got from the drawer to coat his own fingers, but Luciano interrupted.

“Let me do it. I like doing it.”

“You take too long” 

“We’re not in a hurry.”

“Says who?” Martín arched an eyebrow. “I’ll have you known I’m very busy tonight” 

“Oh yeah? With what?”

“Sleeping before 10 p.m.” he teased, leaning down to kiss Luciano slowly on the mouth.

Luciano tried to take the lube from his hand, but Martín moved back and held it high where Luciano couldn’t reach it, but he saw the opening and mercilessly tickled Martín’s armpit. As he squirmed in involuntary laughter, Luciano managed to get his hands on the lube.

“Ha!” he exclaimed in victory and playfully slapped Martín’s thighs. “Go on, turn around, go.” 

Though slightly frustrated with his plans, Martín obliged, sitting on Luciano’s abdomen with legs on each side of his body, and his face staring in the opposite direction. 

Luciano enjoyed the view for a moment as he softly caressed the curve of Martín’s ass, his way of saying sorry for the dirty means used to get the lube.

“See, you’re already taking too long!” Martín complained, though Luciano could hear the smile in his voice.

“I know you like it.” Luciano jested, squeezing a bit to make a point. 

Martín let out a chuckle. Supporting himself with both hands on Luciano’s thighs, he pushed his body forward, rubbing their erections together. Luciano gasped in surprise and Martín was pleased, so he took both in his hand and stroked them, not too fast but not slowly either.

That seemed to get Luciano to work faster. He covered his fingers generously with the lube and spread Martín’s buttocks with the other hand. The first finger went so easy he quickly added the second, so he didn’t know why Martín complained he took too long, really. He still was thorough in his work, making sure everything was lubed and stretched and relaxed, though the last two were too easy at this point. 

It was fun, though, to go a little slower than he needed to and listen to Martín softly moan, or how his hand lost its pace for a second as his body trembled. And it was good that Martín was touching him like that because the sight of Martín’s cute pretty ass was a view Luciano quite enjoyed.

“That’s enough,” Martín mumbled, looking at Luciano from his shoulder with hazy eyes.

“Not yet.”

“It’s more than enough.”

“I like to make sure.”

“Luciano, I’ve been taking your dick for the last forty years. I can’t get any more relaxed than that.”

“Not forty.”

“Bitch.”

Luciano laughed and pushed his fingers around again the spot he knew too well how to find. Martín’s whole body reacted, from his hands shaking to his moan being a little louder than it was before. Satisfied, Luciano took pity on his stubborn husband and removed his fingers slowly. 

Martín sighed and stroked them a while more, something Luciano wouldn’t complain about, and then he let go and turned around to face Luciano, both hands on his chest.

“You took too long.” 

“You like it.” he pinched Martín’s side with a smile. 

He reached for Martín’s neck and pulled him down for a kiss. That was something he liked to take his time with, too. Kissing Martín never got old. They had kissed back when they were only recently independent enemies, had kissed when they were allies, and kissed when they weren’t sure, but for most of their history they didn’t know when the next would come any more than when the next war would come. They didn’t know how to feel about them either, with everything being so complicated between them. For the last four or so decades, they had had their problems, but when their next chance to kiss all their troubles away would come it was no longer a concern. Even if they couldn't get married by human law, it was hard to call it anything else.

Martín kissed him on the lips once more, then on the jaw, then he sat up again. He smiled at Luciano as he positioned himself, but the smile turned into a moan as he sunk his body down to let Luciano inside. 

This also never got old.

Luciano held Martín’s hips but didn’t try to guide him or set the pace. Martín knew what he was doing. He moved his body not too slow but not quickly either because as much as he complained he liked to take his time too. He searched for his own pleasure without taking his eyes from Luciano. Martín pushed their bodies together again and again in a rhythm that was in itself obscene and made sure to tighten his muscles every time he wanted to hear Luciano moan a little louder. At this point, neither could be bothered to hold back a sound or avoid an ugly pleasure grimace. There was nothing to hide, and there was nothing the other hadn’t seen yet and enjoyed, one way or another. 

Luciano kept one hand on Martín’s hips and let the other explore upwards, feeling his abdomen and his chest and his neck. Martín tilted his head up, showing openness to the touches as his thighs continued moving. Luciano made a slow trail up and down him, then suddenly stopped at his erection. Martín’s eyes snapped open and closed again when Luciano started to stroke it, mimicking the pace at which Martín was riding him.

It ended a little faster than they wanted. As he got closer, Martín’s enjoyment of the slower pace fractured and his needs forced him to go faster, to push Luciano inside a little deeper and more carelessly each time, and then there was nothing.

Then they were panting and laughing breathlessly together for no reason, as Luciano played with Martín’s hair as his head laid on his chest. It was always so easy, every time. He always knew where to touch and what to do and knew when it was ending, though not always did he manage to make it last as long as he wished. But he wouldn’t trade it for the world.

He kissed the crown of Martín’s head and cuddled him closer.

“We should do it again,” he suggested.

“Yeah…” Martín agreed in an out of breath whisper. “Just give me a moment…”

Luciano smiled to himself, looking at the ceiling and not thinking about anything.

“You were right, by the way,” he said. “We’re not an old married couple.” 

Martín snorted 

“Of course I was right.” 

Luciano chuckled and kept stroking his hair, feeling himself dozing off until, just when he had almost fallen asleep, Martín’s sleepy voice mumbled:

“By the way, we have to go grocery shopping tomorrow.” 

“Oh, yeah, we do.” He answered just as sleepily.

“The fridge is empty.” 

“Uhum. Did you call the guy to fix the sink by the way?” He murmured without thinking much.

“I forgot. I’ll call him tomorrow.” 

“Yeah, tomorrow is good.” 

And the young lovers fell asleep before 9 p.m. 

**Author's Note:**

> they’re dorks, please comment.


End file.
